In the not knowing…


Today, as I contemplate all that is simmering in my spirit, I am hushed. The gentle voice of my Savior whispers words of comfort to my soul and peace to my heart. More and more I am realizing my role in His plan. And the further I go…the more comfortable I get…in the not knowing.

What I mean by that is that I just can’t possibly see the aerial view of this journey I’m on. And I’m understanding more and more that is not the point. The point is that I trust Him. I trust Him not to lead me where I should not go. I trust Him not to hurt me. That’s what makes it a journey. If I knew the destination ahead of time, the nuance and discovery along the way would be lost.

I feel Him tugging at my heart, prompting me further on…asking gently if I’ll follow where He leads. And I am…I’m not sure where it is or how I will get there, but I follow. Because nothing is better than a journey with Him.

I’m finding that He is speaking to my heart all the time these days. Or (as Pastor Steven pointed out yesterday) maybe I’m just finally listening. I’m more calm than I have been in a very long time. I have a restless heart and it is unusual for it to be so quieted. That is the gentle power of my Savior.

I have discovered a kindred spirit along my journey. I’ve mentioned her before, but today is different. She is half a world away serving Jesus and His people in a foreign land. She should be laying her head down for the night. And as she does so I pray…as I have been from the moment that she left. That He would use her in a mighty way in that place. I have…and do miss her tremendously. But today is different. Because in her absence, my awareness of my Savior has been heightened. And for that I am grateful.

The work that is beginning right now in each of us is remarkable. I know that to be true. This is a turning point for me. A time that will forever be marked in my soul. It is a time of growth. A time of intimate moments with Jesus, like I’ve never had before. That I pray will continue for the rest of my days.

I have important work ahead of me…I do not understand it. I don’t need to. Not now. I must simply follow, wherever He leads me…

in the not knowing…

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