I just can’t do it all

So, I was thinking about how I try to cram so much stuff into my allotted 24 hours a day. Sometimes it’s worse than others. Like today for instance.

I set my alarm early…I really wanted to meet with Jesus before I rushed out into my day. I had some very specific things that were on my heart as I went to bed and I knew I wanted to revisit them with Him in the morning.

So, I did…in classic fashion, He woke me up just before my alarm. Giving me the conscious choice to either turn off the early alarm and go back to sleep or do what I had set out to do and meet with Him.

I don’t always choose well in these situations…especially in the mornings, but today I did. The thoughts running though my heart as I went to bed were right where I had left them. I was blessed with amazing sleep despite all that was swirling around my soul…and I’m very thankful for that.

I went to my spot with pen, Bible and journal and poured out my heart to my Savior. It was amazing…so much so that I lost track of time and began the rest of my morning routine much later than I prefer.

And I had a huge list today. In addition to the regular items to accomplish before I walk out the door…I had some product to bag and bring to a couple of my customers, a friend of mine had asked that I bring a copy of something we did at church a few months back, and I had a birthday in my advisory (meaning that I needed to stop by the store for the usual doughnuts and chocolate milk for my kids).

As I was getting ready…as fast as I could…I was going through this list seeing if I thought I could do it all and not be late for school. I decided to look up the thing from church on-line and print it off at school…one thing down. I knew I wasn’t going to go home before a hair appointment later, so I had to go pull the products and bag them to take with me.

Which left the store…to go or not to go…when I got in my car I debated all the way to the point where I had to go either straight to school or by way of the store. And these were my thoughts…we don’t have any more days of advisory before Christmas. We have a Christmas party tomorrow, however, this kid’s birthday is right before Christmas and so he is constantly being coupled with the holiday and I just didn’t feel like I could do the same thing. Right or wrong that was more important to me than whether or not I was on time today.

So, after picking up the items as quickly as possible, I called to school trying to find someone that could be in my room during the passing period until I could arrive a min. or so after 8. I did find someone and everything was fine. I’m not sure if I had it to do again I would do things differently…except that makes me think.

Why do I try to do it all…?

I’m not really sure what the answer is to that today. I have a giving personality. I want those I come into contact with to know that I value them. Especially my kids. I am capable of a lot of things and I want to do as much as possible. But sometimes my desire to do outweighs the amount of time I’ve been given. So, I guess what I need to learn is that prioritizing doesn’t mean that I don’t value what ends up at the top of the list more than the bottom…especially when it involves people.

It just means that I’ve only been given a certain amount of time and I must prioritize. Because I want to be a woman of my word…and my time. Doing what I need to do and what I get to do, but all with a realistic view of what will fit into the time I’ve been given each day. Because no matter how great the things are that I would like to do…

I just can’t do it all.

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