Have you ever heard someone do a mic check? You know…”testing…1, 2, 3…” But after 3, what do you say? It’s like your whole vocabulary escapes your mind. You can not for the life of you think of something to say…I’ve felt rather dry and like I just don’t have anything to say lately.
okay…for months, actually…I’m working on it…
This weekend at church Pastor Steven really hit a nerve for me. Not in that gee-I-wish-he’d-stop-reading-my-mail kind of way, but in an ahh-ha-that’s-it-finally kind of way.
I’ve spent a lot of time spinning my wheels over this blog and trying to figure out why I came back from India and felt like I just had nothing to say. I think I figured I’d work my way out of it. So, honestly…it remained on the back burner most of the time…like I felt that it would resurface in its own time and I would some day wake up and say
“Wow, I feel a blog coming on…I have so much to say about that.”
but that day never came
So this weekend, a prayer has developed in my spirit. Born directly from our text Acts 28:17-31 (I needed to back it up and provide myself a bit more of the context this morning).
Paul is speaking to some relatively outspoken, divided, religious people (shocker, I know). As his final statement, he takes them back to a very familiar scripture in Isaiah 6:9-10
Go to this people and say, you will be ever hearing but never understanding; you will be ever seeing but never perceiving. For this people’s heart has become calloused; they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears, understand with their hearts and turn, and I would heal them.
Today as I re-read this passage, a prayer developed in my heart. One that, while it does not provided distinct answers, is a sovereign solution to the questions in my soul. I want this truth to sink deep into my spirit..
May I hear…AND understand Your voice.
May I see…AND perceive Your work on my behalf.
May my heart NOT be calloused…but rather tender and sensitive to Your direction of my life.
May I hear you clearly…loudly.
May my eyes be open, that I may SEE with my EYES, HEAR with my EARS and most importantly UNDERSTAND with my heart; so that as I turn, you will heal me. I love you so much. I am unsure about what to do next. Please make the path clear and lead me where you want me to go. Help me to hear your voice loud and clear and give me the courage to follow where You lead me.
So, today I trust Him to fill in my blanks…